[it's true. in his own way. most people don't appreciate kavinsky's ways, so caroline isn't alone; that she tolerates them is all right. this started out as a silly game, gansey as his opponent, but he doesn't have a lot of friends lately. he can't afford for them to slide off into sad vampire land.
(or maybe he can. but that doesn't bear thinking about.)]
Yeah?
[the car stops abruptly right by the curb. so abruptly that the suspension creaks a little, the tires squeak, and caroline probably jolts in her seatbelt, but it wouldn't hurt an ordinary girl, never mind her. kavinsky cocks his head.] I wanna see.
Fine. [ she lets out a breath, rolling her eyes at his request. unlike anyone else who'd ask to see her fangs lately, she doesn't really feel the need to hesitate. kavinsky is made of tougher things, he's got something twisted in side that she doesn't think would let him shy away from some vampire fangs.
still, she leans back from him as she shifts and lets her fangs drop, the veins swirling beneath her darkened eyes. she moves back as if she's worried that he might do something reckless like try and touch them. ]
powerpose! let me know if not ok and ill adjust, or you can disregard/interrupt any part
[it turns out that caroline hasn't known him very long, but she knows him awfully well despite that. she leans back, as if she knows he'd nodded approval at the monstrous black bird-headed thing that tried to kill ronan, laughed off the live molotov cocktail that the other boy had slipped into his hand inside of a closed car. he has a propensity for dangerous things.
which isn't to say that he doesn't find her black-veined eyes and razor-tipped fangs disturbing to look at. just that-- he has a rather different, specific reaction to disturbance. comes, in part, from being at the center of all the worst ones he's met.
this is the part where he leans across and kisses her on the fangy mouth, quick, deft. nothing accidental about it.]
[ she doesn't get a chance to really react. even with her supernatural speed, he moves quick enough to catch her off guard. mostly because she doesn't expect her "gay bff" to kiss her. not that she's ever really had one before. so when he leans in, a part of her thinks he's just looking at her.
needless to say, she lets out a shocked half-gasp, half-strangled laugh when his lips suddenly touch hers, she flinches in surprise as her eyes look at him and her hand moves to his chest, holding him at bay, just in case. she needs clarification, she's confused. more than.]
What... What was that for? [ the smile on her face is nervous, a little uncomfortable, but mostly born of an usually well hidden low self esteem.]
[how can girls be that sad, kavinsky wonders briefly. it's not exactly compassion. it's mostly that he's known a lot of girls, gave them a lot of pills, nearly lit them on fire in sheer indifference once or twice. he knew something drove them to be the way they were with him, and he might have supposed there was some kind of weakness and vulnerability to it. he's a shark; he's good at sensing that stuff. but he hadn't thought about how very sad. he hadn't cared.]
If I just said 'it's not bad' you wouldn't believe me, babe, [he tells her, with perfect certainty. he turns off the ignition and the car falls quiet. he also pushes the door open with an audible clunk, and then gives her a look.] In one ear, out the fuckin' other.
[ girls can be that sad. although there's no real rhyme or reason to caroline's shaky self esteem, the way it rises and falls like the tide. it's so much better than it used to be, before she became who she is now. but it'll take time to repair whatever mysterious damage has been done to it.
however, despite what he thinks, she doesn't believe that her face, morphed is not too bad. it's not the way she looks that worries her, it's not the way she looks that makes people balk. it's what she can do. it's the monstrosity of what vampires are, the things they have done that make people turn away from her. she's different but for the rest of her life, she'll have to prove as much.
he moves to exit the car, saying what he does and she lets out a breath. she's frightening, for other reasons.] That's.. I don't think that. [ he's right, sort of.]
You don't think what? [kavinsky waves his arm at her, no real urgency to it.] You don't think it's bad, or you don't think I'm wrong? [get the fuck out, the gesture says. he looks at her through the windshield for just a moment, before turning his head to look at the bar fronts. it's really early to be drinking today, but he's a nutcase, she's a vampire. she might also be a nutcase. it's fine.
he doesn't keep people who are all sane, and he's always been that way. what kavinsky doesn't think about, is the fact that he used to crush people like her. sometimes because he meant to-- because he figured out how, developed a strategy, made up a game for it to kill the time. and maybe a couple of innocent lives on the way. other times, because he simply wasn't watching where he was going; because he didn't care about the hearts and souls behind the collateral damage. laughed about it afterward, sometimes, built it into his ever more dread reputation.
he's not laughing now, though. and he isn't thinking about what other people think about him. shockingly, he's only thinking about caroline.]
That my fangs are bad, [ she says somewhat defiantly, even if she sort of things they must be bad or terrifying. it's not that about her that she thinks people don't like, it's the things she can do with them, the things she needs to survive.
she climbs out of the car after he does. she isn't going to be crushed by anyone else, not anymore. that's the plus side to what she is, she won't be used or bruised anymore, she's powerful. and it gives her a confidence she lacked even if it denies her things like love and a peaceful life.
at his question, she snorts.] I definitely can. It just takes more. Besides, drinking helps the cravings.
[but her fangs are amazing. kavinsky wishes he had his own set. that probably speaks to there being something wrong with him rather than anything on caroline's part, but it's fine. better than it was, anyway.]
You get cravings?
[behind the fourth wall we are all screaming that this is not information she should've let him know. kavinsky's tone is rather casual. he crosses the sidewalk without looking back, and pulls the door open for her, always the gentleman and the scholar.] I don't even fucking believe it. You got control that NA would kill for.
[ caroline almost rolls her eyes at his question. the way he asks it. and of course, she doesn't know better than not to answer him honestly.] Sure, I have great control but that's because I was a control freak before I was turned. Whatever you're like when you're human gets amplified once you're a vampire. [ She puts her hands out in an "and thus" sort of gesture.]
Blood mostly. [ obviously but since he's taken up the gay best friend mantle... she tilts her head to the side and adds,] And sex too.
[everyone in the audience is screaming behind the fourth wall. caroline stop talking. caroline no. caroline—
--and kavinsky glances back over his shoulder at her, just briefly. and when she walks into the bar, his eyes stay on her, thoughtful, greedy. the problem is, he thinks of himself as less these days. less than he was with his powers; less than he was on cocaine. less than he was before he died. these days, he can't even be relied upon to maintain a stiffy when eponine comes around-- which is in part why he doesn't like the frenchwoman to drop by at all.
blood. sex. more.
he lets the door close, and steps over to the bar.]
How the fuck did you turn into a vampire, if you didn't wanna be one?
[ caroline is really pissing off the audience now.] Didn't you see my memory share? [ she murmurs, tapping the bar only once before the bartender notices her, of course. she orders a drink before she glances at kavinsky.]
I got fed a vampire's blood to save my life. Then I was murdered with the vampire's blood still in my system.
[kavinsky leans on the bar, his narrow shoulders poking up sharply under the corners of his muscle shirt. he orders a coke. the caffeine should stave off drowsiness, hopefully, which happens a lot to him now that he's off the sweet cocaine.
it also serves as camouflage to conceal the very intense interest that he's taking in this information share.] I saw the one where your old man fucked you up in a bolted chair, [he says, throwing some kind of affirmitive gang-signy gesture with his hand.] But I'mma look back at the archives when I get a chance. Man.
A vampire who wanted to send a message, [ katherine wanted to send the salvatores a message but she also did it for klaus, to use caroline as one of the puzzle pieces he needed to become the monster he wanted to be.
she didn't want to think about it, she didn't want to think about jenna or how let down she'd be if she knew that caroline had willingly... with klaus. more than once. that there were feelings developing, developed between them.]
She was here but... I don't know if she still is. [ katherine had stayed out of caroline's way and life and kept a surprisingly low profile here.]
[so there's more than one. or at least, there has been. kavinsky mulls that over in his head, and makes a note to himself to do a little more research on the network before the week is out. surely there has to be some undead person less rigid about their principles and withholding than caroline is.
katherine sounds like she has another thing coming. were this anywhere but eudio, and were kavinsky on somewhat thicker ice-- but alas. and she might not even be here anymore.]
So you're the only good vampire who ever breathed? [he asks.] Unbreathed. [he orders a soda next, slipping currency across the counter.]
No, [ she's quick to answer and she might sound defensive at that. he makes it sound like she's putting herself up on a pedestal of some sort. she doesn't like that. she doesn't want it acknowledged, her being good. she is just is.]
[kavinsky wouldn't be surprised if other people do plenty of the pedestaling where caroline forbes is concerned. she looks the part. so golden, so lovely, and young, and regretful. regrets always make somebody look more good.
but she's sad now, and for some reason that kavinsky doesn't really bother putting into words, he thinks it's only right that he intervenes. so he puts his cup of soda down after sipping it, then leans close over the counter. hikes his eyebrows at her, suggestively.]
[ she rolls her eyes, laughing before she takes a sip of her newly delivered drink.] I'm pretty sure that both are good, [ not that she has any experience with fucking good vampires. damon wasn't... that wasn't... yeah. and klaus is definitely not a good vampire. tyler might count but he was a hybrid.]
It's like people, Kavinsky. It depends on the person and what you like. [ pause] I've had no complaints.
Pretty sure. [naturally, kavinsky fixates on certain phrases and extricates certain meanings from them. especially when he is thinking about sex stuff. even though his boner has been taking a lot of naps lately, his mind is still highly attuned to those sorts of suggestions.
he has to entertain himself somehow.]
What the actual fuck, [he says.] I've been trying to set you up with Count Triad Dickula this whole time, and you into the bad ones? [he shakes his head, and laughs. it's a bright sound; for once, utterly without reservation.] Come on. Bad's fun when you ain't. It's like a fucking math rule.
I don't like the bad ones, [ she snorts, taking another sip. it's just that she keeps getting tangled up in them. although to be fair to her boyfriends, they've been good guys. great guys. ] My exes have all been good guys.
And if you're talking about Gansey... he doesn't.... He deserves someone normal, right? [ besides he seems to have a lot of friends here. he doesn't need her.]
[kavinsky rolls his eyes about gansey because eww gansey ewww.] Bullshit, [he says.] Guy's best friend is a dream thief. Hell, thief, period. Motherfucker jacked his car, in the old world. And the other guy hanging off his nuts is a straight-up murderer.
[the instant after he says it, kavinsky knows that he shouldn't have. that's one of adam parrish's secrets, and for good reason. but it's been awhile since he and adam really talked, and in absence of names-- surely, she's not going to figure that out. and what harm can it do, really.]
Gansey's got darker tastes than you'd think. [he sucks on the straw in his coke, making a really gross hhghghhh sound. then,] You gotta fuck more bad guys. We're fun.
[ caroline sort of stares at kavinsky, startled by what he says. it's surprising to hear, to say the least. after all, she'd gotten the impression that gansey was... well sort of flawless in that broken boy kind of way.
there's a part of her that feels cheated, given gansey's reaction to her truth. but at the same time, she thinks she should probably take what joseph says with a grain of salt. or two.
still, her mind struggles with the idea that gansey is beyond vanilla in his tastes. and she doesn't think there's anything wrong with that. his last words tear her from her thoughs, her eyes rolling at him.]
I've hooked up with a bad guy, trust me. [ klaus is the big bad. of big bads. and she'd been half in love with him.]
[a certain expression of interest steals over kavinsky's face. it's a dangerous look according to most of the local universe. maybe caroline suspects something of its danger as well, but she's faced worse. slept with it even, apparently.]
Just the one?
[but he turns it into a rhetorical question, by glancing away. thinking about the look on her face, when he said about gansey. it might just be his pervasive cynicism, but kavinsky doesn't think he was lying, not even technically. even ronan and adam aside, nobody's really pure. not by the time they're eighteen, any rate. (make that a bag of salt, miss vampire.)]
Thinking about your regrets, Forbes? [he slides his glass over and knocks it into hers, as if they're toasting to that. to regrets.]
I don't regret it, [ she said a little too quickly, glancing at him for a moment as he cheers her. it feels weird, to feel that way, to feel regretful and not at the same time. she should regret it a lot more. ] I should but I don't. I wanted him and so... yeah.
[kavinsky laughs. it's quite an obnoxious sound, even without the fire ants-like malice crawling all over it like it used to. his breath fogs the glass in his hand.
but all he says is,] Well, don't fuck Gansey out of obligation. Monogamy with the Prince of Evil sounds hot too. [maybe? he doesn't know. kavinsky doesn't know ~monogamy~, in the way that some anorexics will deny knowing hunger.]
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(or maybe he can. but that doesn't bear thinking about.)]
Yeah?
[the car stops abruptly right by the curb. so abruptly that the suspension creaks a little, the tires squeak, and caroline probably jolts in her seatbelt, but it wouldn't hurt an ordinary girl, never mind her. kavinsky cocks his head.] I wanna see.
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still, she leans back from him as she shifts and lets her fangs drop, the veins swirling beneath her darkened eyes. she moves back as if she's worried that he might do something reckless like try and touch them. ]
powerpose! let me know if not ok and ill adjust, or you can disregard/interrupt any part
which isn't to say that he doesn't find her black-veined eyes and razor-tipped fangs disturbing to look at. just that-- he has a rather different, specific reaction to disturbance. comes, in part, from being at the center of all the worst ones he's met.
this is the part where he leans across and kisses her on the fangy mouth, quick, deft. nothing accidental about it.]
this is perfectly awesome
needless to say, she lets out a shocked half-gasp, half-strangled laugh when his lips suddenly touch hers, she flinches in surprise as her eyes look at him and her hand moves to his chest, holding him at bay, just in case. she needs clarification, she's confused. more than.]
What... What was that for? [ the smile on her face is nervous, a little uncomfortable, but mostly born of an usually well hidden low self esteem.]
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If I just said 'it's not bad' you wouldn't believe me, babe, [he tells her, with perfect certainty. he turns off the ignition and the car falls quiet. he also pushes the door open with an audible clunk, and then gives her a look.] In one ear, out the fuckin' other.
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however, despite what he thinks, she doesn't believe that her face, morphed is not too bad. it's not the way she looks that worries her, it's not the way she looks that makes people balk. it's what she can do. it's the monstrosity of what vampires are, the things they have done that make people turn away from her. she's different but for the rest of her life, she'll have to prove as much.
he moves to exit the car, saying what he does and she lets out a breath. she's frightening, for other reasons.] That's.. I don't think that. [ he's right, sort of.]
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he doesn't keep people who are all sane, and he's always been that way. what kavinsky doesn't think about, is the fact that he used to crush people like her. sometimes because he meant to-- because he figured out how, developed a strategy, made up a game for it to kill the time. and maybe a couple of innocent lives on the way. other times, because he simply wasn't watching where he was going; because he didn't care about the hearts and souls behind the collateral damage. laughed about it afterward, sometimes, built it into his ever more dread reputation.
he's not laughing now, though. and he isn't thinking about what other people think about him. shockingly, he's only thinking about caroline.]
Can you even get drunk anymore?
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she climbs out of the car after he does. she isn't going to be crushed by anyone else, not anymore. that's the plus side to what she is, she won't be used or bruised anymore, she's powerful. and it gives her a confidence she lacked even if it denies her things like love and a peaceful life.
at his question, she snorts.] I definitely can. It just takes more. Besides, drinking helps the cravings.
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You get cravings?
[behind the fourth wall we are all screaming that this is not information she should've let him know. kavinsky's tone is rather casual. he crosses the sidewalk without looking back, and pulls the door open for her, always the gentleman and the scholar.] I don't even fucking believe it. You got control that NA would kill for.
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Blood mostly. [ obviously but since he's taken up the gay best friend mantle... she tilts her head to the side and adds,] And sex too.
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--and kavinsky glances back over his shoulder at her, just briefly. and when she walks into the bar, his eyes stay on her, thoughtful, greedy. the problem is, he thinks of himself as less these days. less than he was with his powers; less than he was on cocaine. less than he was before he died. these days, he can't even be relied upon to maintain a stiffy when eponine comes around-- which is in part why he doesn't like the frenchwoman to drop by at all.
blood. sex. more.
he lets the door close, and steps over to the bar.]
How the fuck did you turn into a vampire, if you didn't wanna be one?
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I got fed a vampire's blood to save my life. Then I was murdered with the vampire's blood still in my system.
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it also serves as camouflage to conceal the very intense interest that he's taking in this information share.] I saw the one where your old man fucked you up in a bolted chair, [he says, throwing some kind of affirmitive gang-signy gesture with his hand.] But I'mma look back at the archives when I get a chance. Man.
Who the fuck murdered you?
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she didn't want to think about it, she didn't want to think about jenna or how let down she'd be if she knew that caroline had willingly... with klaus. more than once. that there were feelings developing, developed between them.]
She was here but... I don't know if she still is. [ katherine had stayed out of caroline's way and life and kept a surprisingly low profile here.]
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katherine sounds like she has another thing coming. were this anywhere but eudio, and were kavinsky on somewhat thicker ice-- but alas. and she might not even be here anymore.]
So you're the only good vampire who ever breathed? [he asks.] Unbreathed. [he orders a soda next, slipping currency across the counter.]
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There are other good vampires.
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but she's sad now, and for some reason that kavinsky doesn't really bother putting into words, he thinks it's only right that he intervenes. so he puts his cup of soda down after sipping it, then leans close over the counter. hikes his eyebrows at her, suggestively.]
Are good vampires or bad vamps better to fuck?
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It's like people, Kavinsky. It depends on the person and what you like. [ pause] I've had no complaints.
let me know if this is too much infomodding
he has to entertain himself somehow.]
What the actual fuck, [he says.] I've been trying to set you up with Count Triad Dickula this whole time, and you into the bad ones? [he shakes his head, and laughs. it's a bright sound; for once, utterly without reservation.] Come on. Bad's fun when you ain't. It's like a fucking math rule.
it's not!
And if you're talking about Gansey... he doesn't.... He deserves someone normal, right? [ besides he seems to have a lot of friends here. he doesn't need her.]
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[the instant after he says it, kavinsky knows that he shouldn't have. that's one of adam parrish's secrets, and for good reason. but it's been awhile since he and adam really talked, and in absence of names-- surely, she's not going to figure that out. and what harm can it do, really.]
Gansey's got darker tastes than you'd think. [he sucks on the straw in his coke, making a really gross hhghghhh sound. then,] You gotta fuck more bad guys. We're fun.
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there's a part of her that feels cheated, given gansey's reaction to her truth. but at the same time, she thinks she should probably take what joseph says with a grain of salt. or two.
still, her mind struggles with the idea that gansey is beyond vanilla in his tastes. and she doesn't think there's anything wrong with that. his last words tear her from her thoughs, her eyes rolling at him.]
I've hooked up with a bad guy, trust me. [ klaus is the big bad. of big bads. and she'd been half in love with him.]
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Just the one?
[but he turns it into a rhetorical question, by glancing away. thinking about the look on her face, when he said about gansey. it might just be his pervasive cynicism, but kavinsky doesn't think he was lying, not even technically. even ronan and adam aside, nobody's really pure. not by the time they're eighteen, any rate. (make that a bag of salt, miss vampire.)]
Thinking about your regrets, Forbes? [he slides his glass over and knocks it into hers, as if they're toasting to that. to regrets.]
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[ De-Nile (denial) is not just a river in Egypt.]
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but all he says is,] Well, don't fuck Gansey out of obligation. Monogamy with the Prince of Evil sounds hot too. [maybe? he doesn't know. kavinsky doesn't know ~monogamy~, in the way that some anorexics will deny knowing hunger.]
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